DP has taken her hatred of my mother a little too far. My mom came for a visit Sunday. She just got to see the baby as DP and DS already had plans with friends and their kids for a boating and fishing and swimming at the lake day. Since my mom is selling the house she brought over a bunch of my things from years past. Amongst all the childhood games and Barbies were the cap and gown and letters sash from my college graduation. The cap and gown were my mom's from her college graduation in 1967. I wore it at mine, but with a different sash as I went to a different college. I wore my mom's because it was so nice. By 1991 caps and gowns were being cheaply made yet costing a fortune. My mom's was beautiful. Well DP wants to throw it out. Because of course, since it was my mom's, no child of ours can wear it. It does not matter to her THAT I ALSO WORE IT. And if we get rid of it, then my college graduation garb is GONE TOO. Now the christening gown is ok to keep. My mom did not wear it - just my brother and I. My son wore it. But DD is going to wear something DP's nieces wore just a few years ago. I want her to wear mine.

So the gown is going in the garbage or the giveaways because I just don't care anymore. The last two nights I have worked hard at my second job. I've come home after a long day at work (after a long night of interrupted sleep) and I've done my chores without complaint. Took care of the dogs (feed, put out, put out again before bed), cleaned up after dinner (dishes, bottles prepared, etc), washed and folded a load of laundry, vaccumed the kitchen and laundry room floors, spent time with kids and put to bed, pumped twice. And prepared clothes, lunch, pumping supplies for next day at work. Is that enough for you? So last night she complained that I just come home, do what I need to do and then go to bed. She had the nerve to complain that I don't spend time talking to her. Funny how this together time was just a discussion on another reader's blog.

For one, there is nothing to talk about anymore so I don't know why she complains. Two, when I walk in the door she says she is done and then sits on the couch and watches tv or talks on the phone to her family for the rest of the night. On nights she cooks I am lucky if the food is ready when I get home. Usually we don't eat until after 7 so by the time I get kids to bed and dogs done it's 10 pm anyway. If it is leftovers, nothing is done when I get home and after I feed the dogs I have to get everything heated up and served. I'm so not kidding - 6 pm and she is DONE. But during the day - all she does is take care of the kids. Cleaning bathrooms, laundry, all that is left for me.

Even if I wanted to, there is no time to spend together. DP works as a team only when it is convenient to her. Why sit and talk. All she wanted to "talk" about last night is why I felt I had to keep the cap and gown. She flat out said if my mother hadn't worn it, it wouldn't be an issue.

Something else happened last night - she bitched about something or other and then went outside to smoke. I was left at the dinner table with the kids and fighting back tears as my 3 year old says over and over "Mumma you sad too?"

I have to get out....