Many Thoughts

I've been feeling kind of sad lately and haven't had much time for posting. I'm sure it is just pregnancy hormones and my natural depression. But lately I've been crying at everything. A tornado touched down near my home very early Saturday morning. Luckily it was not close enough to cause any damage in my area, but 2 people did die. One was a little boy. DP brought DS in bed with us, just in case we had to head to a closet and then God Bless her, she stayed awake until the danger passed while DS and I tried to rest. Then I watched the news of all the people in California who have suffered through fires and great losses. It has all made me cry. But of course with the state of affairs in the world, no wonder God is angry. Why can't we see the warnings? We have to take better care of the planet.

And then it seems a lot of people in the blogging and NWA world are suffering as well. It breaks my heart. There have been a few comments lately about people having a hard time sharing in the joys some of us are experiencing. I totally understand that. I'm feeling guilty about sharing my joy. But then I realize that is just silly. I don't want those people to hide their hurt and I know I shouldn't hide my joy.

I've been trying to keep up with blogs and comments, but I'm very busy at work and so I don't have much time. For that reason, I am praying here specifically for the following people:

Tammy - as she struggles with new and sad news
Mandy - as she struggles with grief and loss and hope for the future
Shari - as she goes through some life changing events
Cindy - as she struggles with depression

I pray that they will find the peace and happiness they deserve.

There are a lot of other random things I want to talk about. One is the Barbara Walter's special on Thomas Beatty. I hate the way Barbara acted. I hate all the people who can't understand that some people are just different. I hate the DJ's on our local radio station who just this morning, without really coming out and saying it, implied that Thomas was just plain weird. Hate is a strong word, I know. I shouldn't hate. But I do. Granted, I'm a lesbian, part of the "family" and even I don't "get" the who transgendered thing. But the only reason I don't get it is because I've not felt it, not walked a mile in their shoes. I no more "get" why I'm a lesbian except to say that it is who I am and how I feel. And that's how transgendered people feel. They probably don't get it either. They just know what feels right to them. And why does that have to be bad? I will say I am thankful for Stephanie Brill from Maia Midwives in California for being so nonchalant when Barbara interviewed her. She really gave Barbara a calm and cool so who the fuck cares attitude. I'm grateful to Stephanie for her book which was instrumental in helping DP and I conceive our children. I even wrote to her and thanked her - lol - just a side note there. Got a reply back too!

I missed Tammy Etheridge on Oprah, but according to her blog she dissed her gay people. I guess I'm going to have to google it or something.

And here's a totally random thought. I've finally figured out why so many non-handicapped people use the handicapped stall at work. It's been bugging me for a while. Let me give a little background first though - I can't tell a short story. So there is only one bathroom in our building and it is downstairs. It's cold, but not bad. The stalls are roomy. In the building next door there is another bathroom on the second floor. We can get to it by a little crosswalk that connects the buildings on the second floor. One is covered, one is not. It's actually closer for us to go next door. But it's a smaller, cramped bathroom. Ever been in one of those stall where your knees can touch the door? It's almost like that. So I've gotten a bit bigger and now it's hard for me to get in the stall and close the door without having my legs brush up against the toilet. Of course I have pants on, but it still grosses me out. So the other day, I went in the handicapped stall because it is bigger. Oh and I should mention, I never do that anywhere because I'm always so sure that a handicapped person will be waiting when I get out. And I would feel terrible. But as best I know, there is no one handicapped in either building. So okay, I go in, and what do you know? It's the toilet paper. It's different. It's individual rolls and not one of those super sized things in the locked dispenser. And it's nicer toilet paper too. So I check out the bathroom downstairs where there are 2 handicapped stalls. And guess what, same nicer toilet paper. No wonder everyone likes those stalls! Well now I do too. I figure my poor pregnant, hemorrhoid ass deserves it!

And on that note I will go back to work!