BFN

Well, it's another BFN. AF started on Sunday. IUI # 13 is officially a bust and then end of the line for me right now. It was a crappy, rainy weekend and I took some time to be depressed. But only for five minutes, because I have a beautiful soon to be 2 year old son and he needs a happy mom! And he's such a blessing and such a joy! I have so much to be thankful for and will just have to accept it if God does not want me to have another child. I am so grateful for my son and the experiences I have with him - I can't complain about anything. Okay, well I can complain, and I will sometimes, but I feel guilty!

I'm not sure where we are going to go from here. I really want to go back to fresh sperm but we are at a loss on who to ask. We just don't have alot of friends - it's so sad. We really don't have any friends, but that's a story for another day. We are thinking about asking DP's nephew, but that has it's own issues as well - like his mom! I think she would have a hard time with it. DP wants to do frozen at home since she "got me pregnant" at home the last time, but I keep reminding her, we used fresh the last time. And I really think the frozen is not as good! But I think there were also issues with my doctor and the timing and other things that I'll talk about later. Right now I just know that I am taking a month or two off to let the drugs (Clomid) get out of my system and then we'll see where we are financially and what we want to do.